Dad Up!

When I left my wife 9 years ago, I was determined to be the best Dad I could be to my son who was then only 2 years old.

We'd gone to couples counseling for 18 months -- partly to give the relationship every possible chance (after all, we'd been together 10 years; married for 6 years) and partly because I didn't want to leave my son when he was too young.

The more I read about what ages are easiest and most difficult for a child to deal with her/his parents getting divorced, it became obvious that the longer I put off what seemed inevitable, the more difficult it would be for him.

So, when he was 2 1/2 years old, I moved out -- 7 years and one day after we'd gotten engaged (the day after Valentine's Day).  As I went to move a few things to my new home, a blizzard hit. Perfect timing.

Anyhow, in future entries, I'll talk about steps I've taken to try to make sure I put my son first.

Recently, I've seen a close up view of how other people who are a father by biological terms have come up quite short when it comes to being a "Dad" -- whether they were the ones who chose to leave to pursue a younger, more fun woman (leaving their wife/companion and two daughters to lose their house and barely have enough money for groceries much less any other bills) ... or they were left because they were insanely controlling and wouldn't let her have friends or talk on the phone (and when she chose to leave, he wouldn't give her a dime to help pay for food or medications or doctor bills for two children with disabilities).

To them, I say, "Dad Up!"  Or at least "Man Up!"  Will you?